A Life of Freedom

The last year has been trying, but purposeful. Here are a few things that have made an imprint…

Living in freedom is easier said than done…why is that? 

 1. There is, in fact, a battle. One that is in your mind, heart, and soul. Fighting for the truth living inside of you, fighting to conceal your true identity, fighting for your peace. Fighting to keep you in conformity. Fighting to keep you blinded and settled. Every day there is a war for your heart. 

2. Your actions matter, but your heart matters more. I long to see people lead with passion. Passion in their careers and workplace, in their marriages and relationships, and passion to learn more about who God is. I want people to know that love is truly it, the missing piece, to love like God has demonstrated, so simply, yet meaningfully. When we realize that life is meant to simply serve in love, everything now has purpose. Every conversation, smile, wave, plan, and action. Everything becomes intentional, which just makes it so beautiful and real.

3. Your past may be forgiven and forgotten, but the learned mindset, lies, and lifestyle behaviors take time to be transformed and molded into something new. Be patient with yourself and others, just like He is with you. As long as you continue to search for Him, learn about His nature, yield your heart over and over to be shown the next step, and remember who you are in Him through speaking with Him and reading His word, you will be made stronger by the Holy Spirit. 

You see, Jesus loves you. And what that means is that the way He sees you will never be any different. You are free to explore, question, be curious, doubt, laugh, cry…etc. 

Stand tall and firm, not because that is what comes naturally, but because you believe in who God says you are: Loved. Important. Strong. Brave. Free. You are here for a reason to share His love with everyone within your reach. 

Freedom, sweet, freedom, for all that take a moment to feel and believe. 

Advertisements

Captivity 

Completely full, yet I stare blankly…
Paralyzed with thoughts that seem cemented to the inner linings of my brain. 

Thoughts that are wild and colorful,

Just waiting to be unleashed into sprints of action,

Yet there is a hesitation. 

There is a sudden panic of fear. 

Passion can be seen as silliness, or worse insanity…

That cripples me. 

I shouldn’t care, but I do. 

I need confidence. 

I need drive. 

I need the carelessness of a drunk, with a sober-mind still intact. 

Words speak volumes, but they are so hard to form,

So I stare blankly.

The Umbrella 

Lightning isn’t all that violent,

When you have experienced the strike of a word.

Silence can be just as destructive,

I learned that when you slammed the door.

The door of your heart has been locked,

And the flood washed away the key.

Now I am left wondering, with all these questions, 

In a panic of finding security.

Where’s my umbrella?

Where’s my umbrella?

I need my umbrella,

To cover all that’s left of me.

The Hurricane

There is a hurricane blowing. 
It’s wild and uncontrollable. 

Completely reckless and destructive.

It has piercing winds that blow,

And relentless rains that flood.

The eye, being the steady calm, before more waves of troubled tantrums occur.
But as time passes,

It grows tired…

With each violent episode,

It surrenders. 

I am like the hurricane,

Though my winds are gusts of sharp words.

From frustration and irritability of misunderstandings,

And wrongfully expressing the inner parts of my soul… 

And for the rains that fall, 

Mine are more like teardrops, 

Escaping confused eyes, searching for mercy. 

Unlike the eye, mine is off balance and seemingly unsteady,

This being the opposite of still, leaves my mind a cluttered mess,

Leaving me on a mission to find an answer to end this disaster.

But as time passes,

I grow tired…

With each violent episode,

I surrender. 

Walks

Remember when we took that walk, 

and our pup and your fishing pole tagged along…

I snapped pictures to find new inspiration, while you casted for food to fill our bellies. 

I left with more thoughts to cloud my mind, while you left with empty hands.

The whole point was to fill our hearts with simple memories of time spent together,

But no matter what you say, even if you say every word I’d like to hear, it wouldn’t matter. 

I wouldn’t believe you. 

Part of me feels guilty for this, and feeling guilty builds resentment.  

You see, I shouldn’t always have to be the one to ask to take that walk…

One day, maybe, you’ll ask me instead. 

Then, you might catch a smile sneak on my face for no reason, other than in that moment,

 I’ll finally start to believe again…